How to tell your family you are in an interracial relationship.

Telling your family about an interracial relationship can be very intimidating and difficult, especially if you think they may not be very receptive. If you feel you really love your partner, it is better to tell your family earlier rather than later. When you do, it is important to keep a few things in mind. First and foremost, remember that they love you. When your family rejects the person you love, it is easy to feel as though they are rejecting you as well, but most often this is not the case. The way they feel usually stems from a fear of the unknown, or because that was the way they were brought up. Secondly, do not feel guilty for falling in love with someone who your family does not approve of. The fault lies within your family’s prejudices and not within you. You cannot help whom you fall in love with.

So what is the best way to tell your family about your interracial relationship? Here are a few things that may help you when you take that step.

1. It is better to sit your family down and tell them, rather than surprising them by bringing your partner over for a visit. Doing so could be awkward for both parties. When you sit them down, be sure to start with how much you care for your partner, and how happy they make you. Tell them the important qualities about the person first. Since their ethnicity is the least important, leave that for last. Make sure they understand that your partner’s ethnicity is not an important factor for you, and that you are just mentioning it in advance so they are not surprised when they meet your partner.
2. Be prepared for anything. Your family may be very accepting of your new relationship, or they may threaten to disown you. Whatever their reaction, be prepared, so they are unable to guilt you into feeling bad. Stay strong and confident about your feelings for your partner. Remember that this may be a surprise for them and give them some time to adjust to the idea.
3. It is important to avoid threatening your family or giving them any ultimatums. Allow them to make the decision on how far they would like to go if they are truly unhappy about your relationship. Let them know how important your family is, but also how important your partner is to you. Your partner would never ask you to choose between them and your family, and that you hope your family will not ask you to choose either. If your family decides this is something they cannot accept, be understanding but also be firm and stick by your decision to be with your partner. Keep the lines of communication open with your family as long as they will allow it. They may come around when they see how happy you are in your relationship. Even if they don’t come around, at least you will be able to say you did everything you could, but in the end, they made their decision.

Being in an interracial relationship may not be easy if you do not have your family’s support, but if you’ve truly found someone who makes you happy, then it is all worth it.






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